A cemetery is a location where bodies are laid to rest. The inscriptions on the gravestones can tell you a lot about family members and the history of the area.
There are some regulations about what can be put on a headstone, similar to those that apply to churches. There are also rules about where people can be buried.
Clean Up
Using Clean Water
Before beginning cleaning locate the nearest source of clean water. This will be helpful if you need to thoroughly rinse your brush and a sponge as you work.
Soiling and staining of memorials, markers, and statuary can occur from soil splashing, pollution, rusting bolts or other metal features, bird deposits, berries or sap from trees, biological growth such as algae, lichen or moss, and general weathering. Cleaning methods should use the mildest means possible to avoid accelerated deterioration and loss of original material.
Frequently placed flowers (sometimes in vases) and other items can create additional maintenance problems as they can block or damage the stone. Many cemetery policies restrict the type and number of items families may place on lawn graves to keep them uncluttered and safe for mowers.
Be Respectful
Cemeteries are sacred spaces for many people and it’s important to respect the resting grounds of others. This includes keeping conversations quiet and not playing loud music. It also means not walking over other gravesites or removing tribute items, which can be upsetting to the deceased’s families and friends.
Leaving breakable items such as vases or jars at a gravesite can be damaging to the monument and may attract bugs, ants, or other critters. It’s best to leave only biodegradable items that can be disposed of in the cemetery’s designated receptacles.
Many cemeteries have specific rules about how to interact with memorials and gravestones, so always check before you visit if there are any regulations that you should be aware of. Respecting cultural and religious diversity is another important component of proper cemetery etiquette.
Don’t Litter
The word “cemetery” tells you right away that this is a special place. It’s not just a vacant lot next to a church; it’s an area that people specifically choose to place the graves of their loved ones. That’s why cemeteries have a ton of rules regarding what you can and cannot do in them because there is more planning involved than simply digging holes and burying bodies.
It’s best to respect that and keep your trash at bay. Also, do not touch the monuments or gravestones; this shows disregard for those who are resting there. Keep your driving speed low in the cemetery and follow any traffic signs posted within. Also, bring a tool bag with your reusable garbage bags, a rake, shovel and first aid kit in case you need to clear brush or cut up a living tree that is engulfing a tombstone.
Bring Your Child
Bringing your children to the cemetery is an important way for them to learn about death, and it’s also an opportunity for you to talk to them about what they will see when visiting their loved ones’ graves.
It is important to tell your kids that they need to stay quiet at the cemetery, even though they typically can play loudly outside. Explain that their playing might disturb other people visiting the graves and that they should not climb on or touch memorials.
If you have a child that has an older sibling buried in the cemetery, be sure to explain that their sibling is in a casket, and that they are sleeping with their eyes closed, arms folded, and legs bent. This will help them understand that their sibling is still with them, and will hopefully ease some of the anxiety that can come from this visit.
Bring Your Pet
In some cases, people choose to bury their pets at home. This is typically done as a personal, private way to say goodbye to your loved one. However, it can be a difficult and complicated process.
Home burials can also be difficult to keep clean and beautiful. You will likely need to add a grave marker, which can be expensive and difficult to make. In addition, pet owners are not always able to maintain their yards.
Cemeteries are generally maintained by a professional. They can also offer a sense of permanence that is not possible with a home burial. A cemetery may also provide a place to hold a service and say your final goodbyes. This can be a very emotional experience. Some cemeteries even have memorial trails where your pet can be remembered.